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That Time David Beckham Jerked Off While Being Cheered On

David Beckham Jerkoff

Who hasn’t jerked off to someone’s picture before? I did it in high school to this straight boy I had a crush on and made the mistake of telling a “friend” about it, who ended up telling the entire school and I started getting called the “gay witch” the rest of sophomore year. Apparently shooting a load on someone picture is “voodoo shit” in the small town I grew up in.

In a new documentary about Manchester United class of ’92 David Beckham admits that when he joined the team he went through a hazing ritual where he had to shoot a load on a picture of Clayton Blackmore while his teammates cheered him on.

Now I know this is a little different than my experience but still, jerking off in front of a ton of guys to another guys pictures is pretty fucking gay. I just don’t get how that’s totally cool yet I get called a gay witch.. HOW RUDE.

I’ll let David explain in his own words via Metro:

 “Everyone had an initiation that you had to go through on the youth team, that was one of the most uncomfortable ones! The fact that I had to look at Clayton Blackmore’s calendar and do certain things, while looking at Clayton Blackmore… I mean it was embarrassing to talk about! I was embarrassed when I was saying it on camera let alone talking about it more. But it’s something that we all had to go through. It was definitely something I wouldn’t like to go through again!”

 As hazing rituals go, I would gladly do this one. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to pick up an ice cube with my ass cheeks and carry it to the destined spot AND I def don’t wanna drink beer poured out of a dirty cleat, down a teammates sweaty ass crack into my mouth.

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