It’s been a great year for film up to this point. Some instant classics have already come out like 12 Years a Slave and Gravity. But the year is not over yet! This December has a bunch of movies that look incredibly promising, and I’m super stoked to see them all. So get ready to hit up the dollar store a lot because you’re going to be sneaking a lot of candy in to check out all of these films.
The Hobbit: the Desolation of Smaug – 12/13
A lot of neckbeards out there are complaining that these Hobbit movies aren’t following the books close enough. Well guess what? Fucking deal with it. The whole “the movie didn’t follow the book” argument is such bullshit. Just accept it as an interpretation and move the fuck on. No one cares that you can point out all of the subtle differences between the two. What I do care about is seeing an awesome movie. And Peter Jackson has not let me down so far. So crawl back to your mom’s basement where you came from, eat your hot pockets, and stop whining.
American Hustle – 12/18
Last year, David O. Russell gave us Silver Linings Playbook, which was absolutely fantastic. This year, it looks like he’s making another winner. And really how can you not with this cast? The thing I’m most excited for with this film, though, is definitely the 70’s getup. Bradley Cooper with a perm is pretty hilarious. And Jennifer Lawrence looks like a babe in all of the pictures that have been released so far.
Her – 12/18
This movie may be the one I’m most intrigued to see. I’m not sure if it’s going to be terrible or amazing. Which I kind of like going into a film. The premise involves Joaquin Phoenix’s character falling in love with some new futuristic home operating system. I think it’s incredibly relevant to a time now when people are so willing to communicate and develop an attachment to others online that they’ve met or seen before. Also, on a lighter note, check out that stache Joaquin is rocking. He’s gone full hipster for this movie.
47 Ronin – 12/25
There’s not really a whole lot say about this one. It’s Keanu Reeves in a samurai movie. So it’s pretty much going to be awesome. I mean, what more do you need to know?
The Secret Life of Walter Mity – 12/25
Doing his best to out-hipster Joaquin Phoenix is Ben Stiller in The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. If you’ve seen the trailer, then you probably noticed the indie folk music of Of Monsters and Men playing in the background. That being said, I’m totally excited for this movie. Maybe it ends up being terrible. But even if the story is lacking, the cinematography looks like it will be great.
The Wolf of Wall Street – 12/25
Out of the three movies on this list opening on Christmas Day, this is the one that is actually going to get me out of the house to the theater. Let’s see, Martin Scorsese directing and Leonardo DiCaprio starring as a greedy, 80’s business man. Yeah, I think this one has potential. If Leo doesn’t finally get his Best Actor nod, I will be greatly disappointed. I know I haven’t seen the film yet, but I’m fully expecting an amazing performance out of him.
So there you have it. Maybe you have a break in between some Christmas shopping, or perhaps you have no plans and it’s just too cold to go outside and do anything. Whatever it is, there are some great excuses to get to the movie theater this month.