Sports

Top 5 Mustaches in Baseball

mustache

It just so happens that two of my favorite things in life are mustaches and baseball. So today I thought it’d be fun to take a look at the top 5 lip hats in baseball.

5.  Mike Schmidt

Right off the bat (HA puns) is the greatest third baseman of all time, Michael Jack Schmidt. The man had a Hall of Fame career playing for the Phillies and helped lead the team to a World Series in 1980 with a MVP season. But enough about his minor and insignificant accomplishments playing baseball…can we talk about this stache?! Schmidt went with a classic look. It was neat, thick, and iconic really. It must have been nice knowing that even if his baseball career had fallen through, he could always have gone into porn with that glorious upper lip rug.

mike schmidt mustache

 4.  Dennis Eckersley

Eckersley’s stache was quite similar to Schmidt’s. What gives our old pal Dennis the edge in this one, though, is that added a little flair. While Schmidt’s clearly had its boundaries above the lip, Eckersley introduced a bit of the horseshoe and had his come down just a little onto the sides of his mouth. It’s a mustache that would fit perfectly in an 80’s porno.dennis eckersley mustache

3.  John Axford

Number 3 on my list is the baby of the bunch. The casual fan may not be aware of him, but what Mr. Axford lacks in experience, he more than makes up for with his gem of a mustache. While he has been a serviceable relief pitcher for the Brewers over the past few years, his real gift to the world is his beautiful handlebar. A man clearly born in the wrong era, Axford pays tribute to a time long past with this lip spinach.

john axford mustache

2.  Goose Gossage

Goose Gossage is known throughout the world of baseball as being a pioneer of the closer position. But for our purposes, the man was far braver when he threw caution to the wind and gave us a horseshoe mustache the world rarely gets the chance to see. It wasn’t just your typical horseshoe that you can find at any sleazy truck stop. This man was no ordinary peasant. No no, he decided to let that thing run wild the farther down his face it went. The Goose’s domination of late game situations is matched only by his conquest of my heart.

goose gossage mustache

1.  Rollie Fingers

Continuing our relief pitcher heavy list…Rollie Fingers was a very special player in his day. In fact, he even managed to get his number retired by two different teams (Athletics and Brewers). Clearly the man had talent on the diamond. The ability to throw a baseball, however, pales in comparison to what Fingers had going on with that mustache. This flavor saver was no ordinary handlebar. The edges of this beast curled so much that they practically created two full circles on either side of his mouth. Now that is impressive! Fingers’ villainous, yet classy look, is the reason he made it to number 1 on my list of the best mustaches in baseball.

rollie fingers mustache

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About Alex

I'm Alex. I blog for AnythingGoes. Things that interest me include music, fashion, bourbon, sports, and film.