The Fornicator

We Had Sex With a Fake Butt – Big Ass Bang Review

Big Ass Bang

I am a girl. So I am without a penis, so I cannot have proper sex with the CyberSkin Virtual Sex Ultra Big Ass Bang Doggy Style Pussy & Ass. Because of this omission of central key body parts, I recruited my friend…let’s call him Woody Greencap. Here is his review of the Topco Sales product.

 

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So I was convinced to have sex with a Rubber Butt. I agreed to doing this review while drinking with some friends. Being a man of my word, I had my way with the aforementioned Rubber Butt.

Here is my review:
Weight:
My initial reaction of the Rubber Butt prior to naughty time was how freaking heavy it was. I mean it has to be at least 25 pounds. Is that the normal weight of an average sized woman’s ass?  I thought this was a good quality of the Butt. The weight of it definitely stabilizes the structure and keeps it from moving around, doesn’t require you to hold it and really allows for thrusting motions.
Size:
The size and shape of the Butt were perfect. Its actually a nice looking Butt. Although, As I mentioned earlier, its probably not something that’s going into your carryon suitcase during vacation or business trip.
Feel:
This was probably the hardest part to get over. It doesn’t feel real to me. Its rubber. Its smells of rubber. I guess it could be worse.
Amenities:
It came with a warming probe which I thought was interesting. You plug in the probe, it heated up and then you insert the warming probe into the desired hole to “preheat the oven”
*The butt didn’t come with any lube (unless I overlooked it). This would be an essential amenity for me. The reasoning becomes more apparent in the following paragraph.
Anatomical:
Like I mentioned earlier, the curves were on point. Nice and plump. More cushin’ for the pushin’.
The Butt and vagina holes were an issue. They were extremely small. Despite using lube it was like inserting a square peg into a round hole. Even after my grand entrance, it was like there was someone inside the butt squeezing my manhood. Lets understand something, I am a 5 foot 8 white guy with small feet so I’m not breaking any records in that category. Any average sized penis is going to deal with this same issue. If you wear magnum condoms, just forget this thing even exists.
Cost:
I think the company has to come up with a more cost effective way to manufacture these for less and in turn, sell them for less without compromising quality. $500 seems pretty steep but then again, I’ve never been in the market for something like this.
Comments:
Overall the product is headed in the right direction. A few minor tweaks and a way to sell it for less and the company may be on to something. Regardless of any manufacturer modifications, that was my last date with the Rubber Butt.
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About emja

Emja* was born in Björk’s house in Iceland and grew up on Easter Island, where her parents were giant stone heads. She has the ability to fire beams of tacos out of her hands and she can turn her legs into tigers. On Sundays, Emja enjoys reading Family Circus and traveling through time. Her favorite color is greenish-transparent and her favorite movie is the one you just watched. Emja is in charge of uploading the staff bios to the website, and no one has checked over her work. *name has been changed